Written by Tara and Tiff
Tara and Tiff are hosts of the Real Talk with the MSs podcast, a podcast about their lives as military spouse mamas who are on a mission to speak life into other spouses. Jennifer & Laura have enjoyed being guests on their show and we are humbled to be able to feature this beautiful blog post from them, where they look back in remembrance of September 11, 2001. Be sure to check out their podcast to laugh, cry or simply vent!
9/11/2001: The tragic day that drastically changed the military family dynamic forever. Our military service men and women would be asked to answer a call and so would their families. Following 9/11 there have been far too many goodbyes, too many tears cried, too many lives lost, too many families torn apart, and too many questions will forever be unanswered. BUT now looking back we can see that there were far more beautiful relationships built, prayers answered, strengths discovered, honor found, and pride worth standing for. When MOC asked us to write this blog post we knew immediately we had to gather words from those impacted by 9/11; whether it be on that day or the years to follow. The mamas below are those we look up to and we hope you will find whatever comfort you may be needing within their words.
“Our country has been through so much since September 11, 2001. Military families have stepped up, served, and made countless sacrifices. When military life feels demanding and exhausting, remember the reasons you and your service member first volunteered, and let that sense of pride carry you through the rough days.”
— Lizann Lightfoot, The Seasoned Spouse, and Mom of 5
“Use this opportunity for a few things. 1. Grace. You’ll need to give and receive it. 2. Growth. In whatever ways you feel are necessary, such as personal, financial, marital, parental, nutritional, etc.. 3. Gains. You will gain friendships turned to family and lessons you never knew you needed. Take it all with an open mind.”
– Jennifer Kappes, Army Spouse, and Mom of 2
“For my family, 9/11 was the beginning of the end. It was the end of normalcy in our home and the beginning of long times I was home alone with our very young children while my husband was away fulfilling his duty as an officer in the NY ARNG. That duty began on 9/11 as my husband rushed into the city as others fled, and I was home alone with our newborn and two toddlers.
Four years after 9/11 I was a 32 y/o military widow with 4 boys under the age of 6 to raise alone.
It has taken me years to rebuild my life, but nothing will restore the childhoods my children lost, or the dad who loved them so much. We did learn how to stop asking “Why us, why him?” and replace that with Why not us, why not him?
Nothing would have stopped Lou from responding to Ground Zero that day, or showing up to serve every day after. That is just who he was.”
– Barbara Allen, Gold Star Wife, Author/Writer/Podcast Host, and Mom of 4
“To all the military mamas out there, know that you are extraordinary! It’s not the easiest journey but it’s the most rewarding adventure and you are creating the most amazing life for your babies.
Whether you’re a first time Mum, been doing this for a while, or about to become a mother: give yourself some grace, love yourself and your family, know that you are not alone, and remember that even during the darkest times the light and reward on the other side is the brightest and greatest you will see. Stay strong Mama, you’ve got this. xx”
– Gems Collins, Army Spouse Entrepreneur, and Mum to Be
“In the hardest of moments remembering that I get to be my daughter’s person. The person she looks to for comfort, support…everything. I think about the impact my mom has had on my life and what our relationship means and that I have the privilege to be that for my daughter. With that thought in mind it helps me to get through the hardest moments and go the extra mile for her.”
– Samantha Costello, Marine Spouse, Owner of Core Fit, and Mom of 1
“Military life is one of contrast and contradictions. On a given moment I could describe it with all of these words…exhausting, restful, unknown, familiar, strange, sweet, tense, loose, unpredictable, reliable, and frustrating all jumbled together. These descriptions seem to be contradicting and they are. That is because in the pain there is comfort. In a time where everything is falling apart, I have never felt more held together. Because when things get hard, I know my God even deeper, rely on my friends even more and realize strength I never knew I had.
Martin Luther King Jr. said, “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”
He sums it up so eloquently, but military life demands so much from you that in return in gives so much more in that it reveals faith, character, strength and friendship you might never have found.”
— Kristin Graham, Army Spouse, Podcast host On The Ground, and Mom of 4
“Ask yourself these questions while occasionally having a good shower cry: 1. Did you keep them alive today? 2. Did you show them Jesus? 3. Did you laugh? It’s all about your mindset and a whole lot of grace.”
— Tiff & Tara
“Patriot Belle” by Heather Marie sings “she knows the pain of the long days. Only her prayers fill the silence of the night. God knows the truth, everything she’s got to lose and she does this for every one of you. She’s our Patriot Belle and she’ll go through hell and back again for the country she loves and her man. She’s as brave as she is strong but she’ll never walk alone”. This community is full of mama beauty and strength. Just as those Military Mamas before us were brave enough to answer the call that spirit and pride still exists today. Please know, Military Mama, you are not alone and be sure to let that other Military Mama know the same. Together we will!
Tiffany & Tara
Real Talk With The MS’s
Our mission is to help speak life into other Spouses.